We have all experienced someone who cannot wait to bring you down, rain on your parade, or piss on your dreams. It doesn't matter how big or small your success, this insensitive jerk is going to do something to try to take the wind out of your sails. If this sounds completely foreign to you, then you either have the greatest friends and family and acquaintances in the entire world or YOU might be that person.
___________________________________________Are you a fun sucker? Let's examine a few scenarios.
Situation 1: Your friend has always dreamed of pursuing a career in music. At lunch they tell you that after their open mic performance at a local club, they were approached by a representative for a small agency and were told to come in and talk. This could mean more gigs and possibly their big break! You say:
A) That is so awesome! I've known you were talented for a long time and it's great that someone else it taking notice! Good luck!
B) Well don't get your hopes up. Very few people really make it big. I think you're great but the road to stardom is littered with talented people.
C) Do you know Bob in accounting? He's in a band on weekends and an agent approached him last year. It turned out to be bogus and they wanted money. People aren't always what they seem.
Situation 2: Your partner is on a long needed vacation and will be home in 3 days. You receive a bit of bad news in the mail. It is not urgent and there is nothing your partner can do about it. You get a call from your partner with details of their trip and asking how things are at home. Do you:
A) Tell your partner things are mostly okay and you'll talk more about it when they are home.
B) Smile and tell your partner you are glad they are having fun because they deserved a break.
C) Explain to your partner that you got bad news in the mail and that you aren't sure what to do about it.
Situation 3: Your brother just called to tell you about a new job opportunity. It's finally something he has been educated to do and something that he enjoys and the pay is a little better. You know that he has difficulty budgeting, and the new job will be paid on a monthly basis. You:
A) Tell your brother you're happy for him and hope he can manage to get his budget under control enough to make the transition to the new pay scale workable.
B) Laugh and say, "Haha good luck with that. You can't get your bills paid when they DON'T give you all the money at once. You'd be better off staying where you are.
C) Congratulate him. Working in a field you enjoy is something we all want.
Situation 1: A (3) B (1) C (2)
Situation 2: A (2) B (3) C (1)
Situation 3: A (2) B (1) C (3)
Mostly Threes: You're a supportive person. You believe in allowing people to experience joy without needing to jab your sword of sadness right into the heart of their moment in the sun. You know that there is very little in life that is so urgent that you can't let another person enjoy that feeling of pride or excitement.
Mostly Twos: Maybe you mean well, but it seems like your congratulations always come with a warning. In some cases these sound more like no congratulations at all. Remember... no one asked for your advice. When they do it will sound something like, "What do you think?" or "What should I do?" If you didn't hear those things... leave it alone.
Mostly Ones: You're really bitter about something aren't you? What is it about someone else's success that just throws you right over the edge and into asshole territory? People tend to avoid you when they are happy because you've proven time and time again that you're incapable of letting a parade go by with only sun or a dream to be dreamed without being pissed on.
In short, for the fun suckers out there, try to be a little less of a worthless excuse for a human being. Just because your life is miserable doesn't mean that you have to bring the rest of the world down in your shit shower. Perhaps you're not trying to hurt anyone's feelings or ruin a special moment, but you are not so completely without social intelligence that you don't realize the appropriate response is to be happy for another person's good fortune. Remember, you get back from the world what you put into it. Those Negative Nelly thoughts might just be the reason "nothing ever seems to go right" for you.