Wednesday, September 14, 2011

A Good Wife

Dawn (female coworker)- Angie, all I want is a good wife. 
Me- Same here, Dawn. She can have all the headaches she wants too as long as she keeps up with the housework. 

And really that's how it is some days. I do my very best to put on the air of "Ms. Independent", but I'll be perfectly honest with you folks, sometimes I just wish I had a good wife. 

The first time I got the email with "The Good Wife's Guide" from a 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly I scoffed. "Oh, EXCUSE ME? You know WHAT? Why don't you make ME dinner for a change?! Try wrangling these kids and cleaning the house and working and and and and... SCREW THAT!"

Lately, the more it gets sent back to me, the more I think... "I have got to get one of those Good Wives!"

1. Dinner ready when I get home - I'll take that! 
2. Clean house - And I don't have to do it? SCORE!
3. Someone to say, "how was your day?" - Bonus points if they mean it and it's not rhetorical!

And that's how I'm feeling right about now. Another 12+ hour day, and I think it would be pretty cool to have dinner waiting when I get home and a hot bath and a cocktail. Or hell, maybe just someone to throw the blanket over me when I fall asleep while munching on my Wheat Thins. I wonder if I can get one of those "good wives" in the "good husband" version? 

Since this doesn't seem to be a quick fix thing, Alex, if you're listening? Do your old mom a favor. When you roll into the house tonight, do me a favor and make sure I am not passed out covered in cracker crumbs? Thanks, you're a doll! 


Left Coast Guy said...


I feel for you. Sincerely. I know what its like to come home after multiple 12 hr shifts. Hell, multiple 16 hr shifts.You deserve everything a good househusband can give you!


Leauxra said...

I was reading this thinking, "OK, this isn't so bad. A little sexist, but... wha-wha-WHAT?"

"...remember, his topics of conversation are much more important than yours."

"Honey, we had to turn the furnace off because it was spewing gas into the house. I think there is still a risk of...'

"Shush, dear, I was telling you about Mrs. Richardson's ridiculous hat."


So, in other news, my boyfriend actually makes dinner for me most nights when I get home. He also does my laundry. Boyfriend fucking rocks. He doesn't need to take off my shoes for me or "fix his makeup". And he is allowed to get pissed if I'm "out all night."

Paula said...

It really is nice to come home to someone who cares how your day went....I think I need to start mandating that there is a drink waiting for me when I come home every day! :)

Ed Adams said...

Is it wrong that I am sending that to my wife?

I think not.


Jen said...

I have NO desire to be married again (been there, done that, took his T-shirt and everything else he once held dear), but I think it would kick-ass to have a few of those Utahan sister wives. Homeschool my kids, clean my house, and make me pie? yes, please!

Jennifer Fabulous said...

OMG I just read that article and I am HORRIFIED. Especially at the one that says "don't complain if your husband comes home late or STAYS OUT ALL NIGHT. He must have just had a really bad day."

Wtf. I'm flabbergasted.

This reminds me of that 1962 Jackie Kennedy interview which aired on tv a couple days ago. She was saying stuff like "women have no place in politics" and "I only have opinions my husband give me". It's insane to think this was just 50 years ago.

Okay, I'm totally off topic here. Lol.

I would love to have a live-in housekeeper who does all this for me. Particularly one who is a super hot guy. ;)

Azra said...

See now the contents of that article would come naturally to women if there was a prequel called "The Good Husbands Guide". Everyone wants a good wife, but no one wants to be the good husband! It's kinda like wanting it to snow in the middle of summer when its 28C/ 82F.

Anyways, you should move to SA. The high number of unskilled, uneducated and unemployed people means that just about everyone here has a domestic worker / maid. Even the "poor" folk.

Angie said...

You're far too kind. Thanks!

Boyfriend DOES rock!

Please demand that he make me one too and I'll be right over!

Shhhhh just sit there and look pretty mmkay?

I once thought it would be cool to have multiple husbands. Cuts down on the boredom, you could pick each one for a special talent (yard work, taxes, car repair, sexy time), and when you're sick to death of them and want time to yourself they would have built in friends to go fishing with!

I thought the same things when listens to the JKO interviews! AND yeah I'd like to have a live in housekeeper that was hot, sexy, and waiting!

haha I was telling LCG the other day that if you weren't doing such a good job of being you already that I wanted to be you if I decide to grow up. This is just one more reason!

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